March 8, 2010

• ‘Twas the Day After Oscar

   

  Apologies to Clement C. Moore:
  (For this year’s poem, as well as last year and the year before!)

  ‘Twas the day after Oscar,
  And all through the “‘wood”.
  Stars were nursing hangovers,
  The best that they could.
  
  The statues were given,
  The parties were done.
  And Mo’Nique was braiding
  her leg hair for fun.
  
  And poor old James Cameron,
  Though richer than dirt.
  Still lost to his ex-wife,
  Now that’s gotta hurt!
  
  And there’s Sandy Bullock,
  With Oscar in tow.
  Bet Keanu now feels,
  Blindsided, ya know?

  And faster than Na’vi,
  The celebrities came.
  And fans whistled and shouted,
  And called them by name.
  
  There’s Clooney and Winslet,
  Matt Damon and Ben.
  And there’s little Precious,
  Making eyes at Sean Penn.

  And poor Tarantino,
  Minus Brad Pitt.
  With his Inglorious Bastards,
  In a funk he did sit.
  
  So here’s to the movies,
  That made lots of money.
    Too bad Alec & Steve,
  Really weren’t all that funny.

  ---

  So yesterday I walked to the grocery store before leaving for my Oscar party, and they even had a red carpet out. LOL.

  
  Only in West Hollywood, LOL

  Then I swung by the Pacific Design Center to see them setting up for Elton John’s party:

   

  I made it home right before the rain started.  It only rained for about 10 minutes and then the sky was beautiful again.  On the way to my Oscar party, I got stuck in traffic, but enjoyed the sunset.

   

  
  Stuck in traffic trying to make it in time for Neil Patrik’s awesome opening

  I won the pool for the third year in a row! This year the purse was $120! I only missed two categories, and they were both short features. After I got home, Jay and I went to Millions of Milkshakes and walked over to take a look at the Elton John Party. The police made people stay so far away that you couldn’t really see much. One of the paparazzi told us when Kate Winslet came out, but we soon left. When I got home, I walked a block up the street to the Vanity Fair party. It’s right in front of the dog park where I take Chazz. Again, the police were kind of being dicks, so I just snapped a few shots with my little camera and walked home. I got to see Sandra Bullock hold up her Oscar, so I was happy.  Until next year…Happy Oscars!

  

  

  
  I bumped into Mr. & Mrs. Samuel L. Jackson on my walk home.
  
  
  Best of the rest, starring Sigourney Weaver, Kate Winslet, Sandra Bullock’s shadow, Katie Perry,
  Russel Brand, Rachel McAdams, Jennifer Lopez, Mark Anthony and Gerard Butler.

  In case you missed it, Jimmy Kimmel’s latest Oscar night video, “A Meeting of the Handsome Men’s Club” was pretty epic:

  • 10:24 pm
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