9 PM:  UPDATE to the UPDATE:  Levi Johnston just posted my blog on his Twitter page and I got like 300 hits in 30 minutes! Which means that right now, Levi Johnston is sitting in a hotel room in New York looking at picture of Chazz!  LOL!!  Then I got a message on my phone from him that said this:

Thanks Levi!  I appreciate the help!  If my blog can change one person’s mind about ever voting for Sarah Palin again, I’ll have done my job. 

---

7 PM:  UPDATE:  Well, Sarah Palin’s daughter’s baby  daddy, Levi Johnston, confirmed today, what I blogged about months ago:  Sarah Palin hates retards!  Now I just need him to confirm that she’s the mother of Michael Jackson’s son, Blanket!  LOL.  I just started following him on Twitter, so hopefully he will follow me and read all of my posts about his whack job, almost monster in law:  He’s actually a pretty funny kid.  He just sent this tweet from New York:

---

1 AM THIS MORNING: 1 year ago today, I wrote a post called “Yes We Will – Count On It“.  It was a exactly one week before the presidential election and I had a conversation with someone who could not fathom a black man in the White House.  This week that same person had the unmitigated gall to send me one of those ignorant emails that spread racism and hate (that I refuse to repost here), telling me I can’t deny “history” and espousing the same disgusting “we’re the greatest country on earth” blah blah blah rhetoric that angry white men like Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh puke out (because an ‘uppity negro’ in power obviously makes them sick to their stomachs).  Guess what?  Racism is still alive and well in America one year later.  I am looking forward to this documentary on HBO next week though (almost as much as I’m looking forward to Levi Johnston’s revelations about Sarah Palin tomorrow).  Check out the kid in the beginning and end of the clip.  His name is Lorenzo.  He’s nine years old and he’s priceless:

 
Halloween is a week away and I’ve been far too busy these past few weeks to come up with a costume.  I keep thinking it will be hard to top last year when I dressed as a moose in a bulletproof vest, trying to avoid all of the Sarah Palins with guns!  I got shot twelve times that night:

West Hollywood always has a huge Halloween carnival where they close off Santa Monica Blvd. and host hundreds of thousands of costumed revelers.  It’s just at the bottom of my street and I’ve never gone without a costume.  Then laying in bed last night, I had an epiphany.  I thought of the easiest, cheapest, most low maintenance costume possible.  All I need to do is: 

• Wear a cream colored shirt   
• Carry a clear Tupperware container
• Get a silver foil balloon
• Maybe pop some Jiffy Pop popcorn
• Walk up to every cute Asian “boy” (mind you, they will all be of age) on Santa Monica Blvd and ask him to take a picture with me while fake puking into my Tupperware container and holding the balloon.  After all, I’ve never had a problem taking pictures with cute Asian boys:

So there you have it.  The easiest costume in history.  I’ll be the Balloon Boy’s father, Richard Heene.  I guess I’ll have to shave the goatee.  Oh well, I’m tired of people telling me it’s gray, a fact I’m quite aware of.  Even if people think my costume is lame, it will be a great way to meet new friends and add to the collage below!  LOL.

My Dad left Saturday just in time for Claudio’s sister, who’s visiting from Brazil, to check into The H.C.  We had lunch in Santa Monica yesterday, and on the way there, while driving down Sunset Blvd., there were 3 Ferraris and 3 Lamborghinis that were drag racing.  Finally a cop showed up, but none of them even got pulled over!  Anyway, watch the video to see what could have been the disastrous results:

Recently, my cousin told me about some people who read my blog regularly but don’t really know me that well.  They remarked to her that, “Everything with Carey is an event!“.  I chuckled when I heard that but laughed even harder this week when I watched the TV show “How I Met Your Mother“.  If you haven’t seen it, it’s a great show that stars Neil Patrick Harris and an ensemble cast.  It’s basically a 21st Century “Friends“.  In this week’s episode, Marshall is derided by his wife Lily for creating another photo montage that drove his friends away.  It seems that Marshall was addicted to creating photo slideshows with music, documenting the most mundane events in his life; like pet-sitting or ordering Chinese food.  LOL, remind you of anyone??    Take a look at this clip, it’s hilarious: 

Heck, I admit I’m a narcissist, but isn’t every blogger to an extent?  (By the way, it’s not narcissism if you truly are better than everyone else!)  It’s baffling to think why total strangers should be interested in looking at my pictures and videos, but yet I post them and expect feedback like any good narcissist.  So I guess Marshall and I have a lot in common.  (I could be in worse company.)  Though, if I start adding my own signing to too many of my videos, feel free to tell me to stop.  I’ll try to spare my readers that indignity!  So without further ado, here are the photos from Lisa & Shelby’s birthday celebration tonight (hardly a mundane event!), set to the tune of Lisa’s favorite singer (and a narcissistic song!).  (YouTube wouldn’t let me post the slideshow with the music, so you’ll have to look at the pictures and listen to the music the old school way!)  Happy Birthday Lisa!! xoxo

 
Click the photo for the best of the rest…

The day started with my aunt and I heading to LAX to meet Claudio and his brother, sister and sister in law, and their two kids, and Chazz of course. Then we picked up my Dad at the airport and headed downtown to Philippes for lunch. Dinner for 17 was at Buca di Beppo and was followed by Joel’s college (American) football game. My brother and his girlfriend and her two kids checked into The Hotel Careyfornia after that, and today they headed down to Disneyland.  I had other plans, and am looking forward to sleeping in my own bed for the first time in nearly a month.  It has been a very long past 3 weeks, and I’m exhausted!  My Dad is going to stay with my aunt for a few days, and he’ll come back up to The HC on Thursday after we celebrate Lisa’s birthday.  I’m looking forward to a little rest and relaxation until then.  Have a good week!

Aunty LuLu is staying at The Hotel Careyfornia!  She’s enjoying the 5 star accommodations and partaking in our VIP program!  My Dad arrives Saturday for a week, which I know she will enjoy.  Tomorrow 20 of our family members are getting together for a big dinner.  Should be fun!

---

40 Days and 40 Palin-less Nights

Yes, I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s been 40 days since I last devoted this space to Sarah Palin and her despicable demagoguery.  I could have posted something about Levi Johnston, her daughter’s baby daddy posing nude for Playgirl, or his delicious new pistachio commercial about “doing it with protection”.  I could have written about the million dollar Xbox or Todd Palin resigning from yet another job (must run in the family) or even her rumored lipstick deal (classy).  But I’ve taken the high road for the past 40 days.  (I’ve also been a bit preoccupied!)  I am pleased to announce however, that I was recently interviewed by the great Stephen Colbert.  As you can imagine, the topic soon turned to Caribou Barbie:

Incidentally, here’s the funniest thing I’ve heard so far regarding the moose murderer’s Machiavellian maniacal memoir, “Going Rogue“:

And so the imbecility continues.  You’re no rogue Sarah, you’re just a …mindless woman with a pretty face and a vapid gaping gash.  Go away!    (Don’t read if you’re easily offended by juvenile sexist comments!)

Five years ago this very second I was in the hospital in Mission Viejo filming the first video below of a crying baby boy who would come to call me “Ca-wee”.  Five years later, little Andy is the light of all of our lives.  In ten years I’m going to show him the second video and wonder if he still has his soap and ketchup bottle collection?  Let’s hope so!  HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDY!! xoxo

For his birthday, Lisa hired “The Lizard Wizard” and Andy’s dream of holding an alligator came true.  He even liked the tarantula and the cockroach (unlike some of the kids…and adults)!  What a brave little boy!

In August, less than 2 months before he died, my Uncle George visited his hometown of Iron Mountain, Michigan and went fishing with his brother.  To say my uncle loved to fish was an understatement.  I think the only thing he loved more, was his wife, his grandkids and his brother!  Despite a cold rain that day, my 81 year old uncle and his brother hiked more than 100 yards through the woods, carrying a heavy canoe to a secret fishing hole.  They had quite an adventure that day, and his brother wrote a story about it that was published in the local paper:

Oh, brother, can we fish …

By JIM SNOWDON, for The Daily NewsI’m staying with my aunt this week, and obviously there are reminders of Uncle George everywhere.  I smell his cologne in the bathroom when I shower.  I’m sleeping on his pillow, which I find comforting.  Tomorrow, friends and family will gather to celebrate his memory.  We’ve been trying to keep this week as normal as possible for the kids.  Last night we made caramel apples which they loved:


Obviously I can’t be with Chazz on his “special day”, so Ryan just texted me this picture of his first birthday cake:

I couldn’t let today pass without acknowledging a birthday.  Chazz turned 1 year old today!!  In that year, I’ve taken over 700 photos of him:

Obviously I can’t be with Chazz on his “special day”, so Ryan just texted me this picture of his first birthday cake: